Protection Services News

This morning, on my day off, I discovered that I forgot to attend a meeting this morning that I had scheduled some time ago. In the grand scheme of things, the fate of the free world did not depend on my attendance. However, I committed myself, and should have honoured that commitment. That, coupled with some other organizational issues I have been mulling over recently, got me thinking about my administration and organizational skills. I’ve not always been happy with how I organize and administer myself as a professional, suffering a few hiccups along the way (some big and some not so big). Today’s mistake dropped me back into feeling like a rookie, and I didn’t like that. The problem is that I don’t like making mistakes, and have a propensity to obsess about them.

I believe that there are many like me. They entered the business world with low self esteem and low self confidence, did not encounter appropriate trainers or were given poor training, worked under poor leaders, etc. It’s hard to learn from your mistakes when criticism was less than constructive. I know that’s where my issues came from. I’ll spare you the gory details. However, the point here is that my first years of my career have left me with behavioural and cognitive scars that impact me still.

I am a follower of the Emotional Intelligence movement. Two of the key factors in EI are those of Self Awareness and Self Management. Self awareness requires you to be aware of your emotions, the way you think, and why. I know why I react the way I do to mistakes. However, if you do not, I recommend that you spend time examining the situation, considering past mistakes and how you handled them, and assess the reactions from those involved. If you feel that your mistakes were of a nature that would cause the world to stop spinning on it’s axis, ask yourself “Did it?”. If you were able to continue your employment, keep your spouse or significant other, or you weren’t sued, then consider that you exaggerated the severity of the mistake. If you keep perspective, you are better able to objectively assess the issue, and should be able to examine what made you make the mistake, and perhaps why you tend to exaggerate your own culpability. This is the first step in overcoming this sometimes debilitating and self-destructive behaviour.

The second factor is that of self management. Once you have learned and embraced your behavioural predisposition to beat your head against a wall for the little mistakes, you may find yourself better prepared to manage your day to day life to avoid such mistakes. Or if you fumble and make another mistake, you may be better prepared to manage it effectively.

I know we’ve all asked ourselves that question once or twice in our careers, but what answers have we actually discovered. Of course we think of the basics: what’s the boss going to do to me. Now, for some people I’ve known in my career, this would be the extent of their thoughts surrounding a mistake for which they were discovered. And that’s not to say that I’m overly concerned about what my boss is going to do to me. It was a mistake that I owned up to, and we’ll move on. But I am concerned about how this impacts on what she thinks about me as an employee and as a supervisor. I am concerned only to the extent that I like my boss, and more so, I respect her. My professional reputation means much to me, and her opinion of my reputation is valuable to me.

I think it’s important to assess the true seriousness of the mistake. Is it truly one of the BIG mistakes? If so, the very first thing to do is to own up to it. As Dave Grossman says in his Bullet Proof Mind seminar: “You’re only as sick as your secrets.” We go through our daily lives doling out the little white lies that are necessary to keep life relatively sane. But pulling off the big lies takes way too much energy, and when it does come out (and it usually does), there is much more damage done to your position and your reputation. If the mistake is not a big one, take it in stride. I’ve always been one to obsess about my mistakes ( a little left-over DNA from my early days of my career), and it’s taken me many years to put my mistakes into perspective. Keep in mind that if you continually focus on the mistake, you may find that the solution will evade your attention. It’s just as well to take your lumps, and put processes in place to ensure it doesn’t happen again. In my case, it’s just a matter of looking at a schedule and a To-Do List. Like I said, the world did not depend on my attendance, but it was easily prevented. I’m more self -aware and better self-managed for it!

Cheers!